Sunday Connections
weekly forum
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Sunday Connections was born out of the realization that in modern life we’ve become more and more disconnected from one another despite the increase in communication technology. It hasn’t necessarily brought us together better, and now the political and social chaos threatens to divide us even more.
Some factors:
- The decline of the extended family
- The increased mobility as people move to search for work or better housing
- The heavy workload people now encounter that takes much of their free time and leaves them exhausted
- The emphasis on rugged individualism in American culture which may have created a population of strong independent people
- And finally, the pandemic
Abraham Maslow, the famous Humanistic Psychologist, drew up a Hierarchy of Needs, what we require in order to sustain life:
- The first level consisted of fundamental needs: oxygen, water, shelter and food
- Just above that on the list was Belongingness.
- Anthropologists have found cultures in which shunning is used as a form of severe punishment. To their surprise, they found that the shunned person frequently went home, turned their face to the wall and died for no physically apparent reason.
- Belongingness is basic to life: to truly belong you must feel as if you are unconditionally accepted as the authentic you.
Loneliness is not due to being alone.
- You can be alone in a crowd or a large family
- You can be alone in a one-on one relationship
- You can feel contented and loved even when separated from others
Loneliness is a health issue: its detrimental effect on health has been compared to smoking 15 packs of cigarettes per day.
Belongingness is a health issue, too; it activates processes in your body that strengthen your immune system and turn on anti-aging hormones.
Loneliness is a health issue: its detrimental effect on health has been compared to smoking 15 packs of cigarettes per day.
Belongingness is a health issue, too; it activates processes in your body that strengthen your immune system and turn on anti-aging hormones.
How do we develop Belongingness?
- First we have to connect with other people.
- The ability to connect meaningfully with others is becoming a lost art in our over-stressed time-pressured culture.
Lack of Belongingness leads us to become self-protective: The self-protective state leads to shut-down of the release of dopamine, the “happiness hormone” and “oxytocin” the love hormone.
- Our immune system shuts down;
- Our cells stop regenerating;
- Our digestion gets screwed up;
- And our calm, cool, analytic problem-solving thinking takes a nose drive.
Too much self-protection can be dangerous to your health and happiness.
Early in life we take on ideas that are subconscious about how to protect ourselves in many situations including human relationships.
Parents strive to protect us by giving us simple rules to follow and we often fail to question those rules as we grow up.
These beliefs may not serve us well in the long run.
To feel truly as if you belong you must challenge these rules.
We will start each session with a very special meditation from HeartMath™ called the Quick Coherence Technique™ to put us all into a peaceful state where we can contemplate.
Then we will look at how we can best connect with ourselves, those around us, and those we haven’t even met yet.
Topics will include such concepts as:
- Awareness of the many filters stored in your subconscious that separate you from others
- How can you feel safe enough to peel away some of those filters?
- What are the simple feelings you can become aware of that you can use to tell if a connection is “safe” for you or not?
- What or who are you barring from your life that might be rewarding to you?
- What are your “inner gems” that no one recognizes? Why don’t they?
- …and more.
Join the discussion! Get the guidance!
Sign Up for Sunday Connections:
Sunday Connections – weekly forum for exploring the mysteries of human-to-human relationships within ourselves, with those around us, and with those we have yet to meet.
Join me for a virtual exploration of what the cutting edge sciences of neuropsychology and quantum physics have to offer us in terms of fulfilling one of our deepest needs: belongingness.