{"id":2545,"date":"2015-12-04T16:56:17","date_gmt":"2015-12-04T16:56:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/creativelifechanges.com\/?p=2545"},"modified":"2021-04-08T23:57:28","modified_gmt":"2021-04-08T23:57:28","slug":"social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/","title":{"rendered":"Social Confidence and \u201cExtrovert Skills\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; admin_label=&#8221;section&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;3.22&#8243;][et_pb_row admin_label=&#8221;row&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;3.25&#8243; background_size=&#8221;initial&#8221; background_position=&#8221;top_left&#8221; background_repeat=&#8221;repeat&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;3.25&#8243; custom_padding=&#8221;|||&#8221; custom_padding__hover=&#8221;|||&#8221;][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Text&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;3.27.4&#8243; background_size=&#8221;initial&#8221; background_position=&#8221;top_left&#8221; background_repeat=&#8221;repeat&#8221;]<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\">\u201cI used my extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cI had to learn some extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cOh, well, I don\u2019t have extrovert skills.\u201d I hear these phrases all the time \u2013 and they drive me crazy. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> When did the ability to be socially graceful or to display good manners become the sole province of one group of people, one temperament?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> Good social behavior is within the reach of every human being, no matter how quiet or even shy you may be. As an introvert, you may need to protect yourself from too much stimulation, but you shouldn\u2019t protect yourself from connecting with others. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> The problem, many introverts assure me, is that it takes too much energy to relate to others. Well, anything you don\u2019t know how to do well takes more effort and involves more stress. Swimming, running, public speaking, cooking a Thanksgiving turkey \u2026 the list is endless. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <!--more--><br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"text-decoration: underline; font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>Here are a few simple reminders:<\/strong> <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>When meeting other people, look them in the eye at the same time you shake hands.<\/strong> (Don\u2019t extend your hand and then glance over the other person\u2019s shoulder as you say hello.) Use their name, too. According to Dale Carnegie, nothing is sweeter than the sound of your own name.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"><strong>Give the other person a chance to shine.<\/strong> Even if you\u2019re networking, don\u2019t focus so hard on your elevator speech that you fail to draw out information about the other person. Listen intently and be appreciative. (This is an especially good tip if you don\u2019t think you\u2019re good at conversation. You don\u2019t have to be. Become a great listener and you\u2019ll get a reputation as a great conversationalist.) <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>Throw some positive bouquets.<\/strong> For example, we all err on the side of thinking that someone needs to do something extraordinary to be worthy of thanks or even praise, yet someone who consistently performs or behaves well, time after time, needs to be told how important this is in order to stay motivated. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> These small affirmations can create long-lasting bonds. People may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you make them feel. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>And protecting yourself from social interaction? A bad idea.<\/strong> According to a joint report from Carnegie Institute, Harvard University, and Stanford Research Institute, only 15% of success is due to your technical skills. A whopping 85% of your success is due to social skills! You spend years of hard work and tons of money acquiring degrees and expertise, and your only return is 15%? Well, no, employers tell me that those technical skills will insure that you keep the job; but the social skills are what get you in the door so that your expertise can be appreciated. Those social skills are well worth developing.<\/span><\/p>\n<div>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\">_______________________________________________________________________<\/span><\/p>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\">Lynette Crane is a Minneapolis-based speaker, writer, and coach. She has more than 30 years\u2019 experience in the field of stress and time management and personal growth. Her latest book is The Confident Introvert, written to help introverts overcome the stress of living in a culture that idealizes extroversion, so that they can thrive, and not just survive.Visit her website at <a href=\"http:\/\/www.creativelifechanges.com\/\">http:\/\/www.creativelifechanges.com\/<\/a> to see more in-depth articles and to view her programs.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cI used my extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cI had to learn some extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cOh, well, I don\u2019t have extrovert skills.\u201d I hear these phrases all the time \u2013 and they drive me crazy. When did the ability to be socially graceful or to display good manners become the sole province of one group of people, one [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2727,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\">\u201cI used my extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cI had to learn some extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cOh, well, I don\u2019t have extrovert skills.\u201d I hear these phrases all the time \u2013 and they drive me crazy. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> When did the ability to be socially graceful or to display good manners become the sole province of one group of people, one temperament?<\/span>\r\n\r\n<br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> Good social behavior is within the reach of every human being, no matter how quiet or even shy you may be. As an introvert, you may need to protect yourself from too much stimulation, but you shouldn\u2019t protect yourself from connecting with others. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> The problem, many introverts assure me, is that it takes too much energy to relate to others. Well, anything you don\u2019t know how to do well takes more effort and involves more stress. Swimming, running, public speaking, cooking a Thanksgiving turkey \u2026 the list is endless. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <!--more--><br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"text-decoration: underline; font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>Here are a few simple reminders:<\/strong> <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>When meeting other people, look them in the eye at the same time you shake hands.<\/strong> (Don\u2019t extend your hand and then glance over the other person\u2019s shoulder as you say hello.) Use their name, too. According to Dale Carnegie, nothing is sweeter than the sound of your own name.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"><strong>Give the other person a chance to shine.<\/strong> Even if you\u2019re networking, don\u2019t focus so hard on your elevator speech that you fail to draw out information about the other person. Listen intently and be appreciative. (This is an especially good tip if you don\u2019t think you\u2019re good at conversation. You don\u2019t have to be. Become a great listener and you\u2019ll get a reputation as a great conversationalist.) <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>Throw some positive bouquets.<\/strong> For example, we all err on the side of thinking that someone needs to do something extraordinary to be worthy of thanks or even praise, yet someone who consistently performs or behaves well, time after time, needs to be told how important this is in order to stay motivated. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> These small affirmations can create long-lasting bonds. People may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you make them feel. <\/span><br clear=\"none\" \/> <br clear=\"none\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\"> <strong>And protecting yourself from social interaction? A bad idea.<\/strong> According to a joint report from Carnegie Institute, Harvard University, and Stanford Research Institute, only 15% of success is due to your technical skills. A whopping 85% of your success is due to social skills! You spend years of hard work and tons of money acquiring degrees and expertise, and your only return is 15%? Well, no, employers tell me that those technical skills will insure that you keep the job; but the social skills are what get you in the door so that your expertise can be appreciated. Those social skills are well worth developing.<\/span>\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\">_______________________________________________________________________<\/span>\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; color: #000000;\">Lynette Crane is a Minneapolis-based speaker, writer, and coach. She has more than 30 years\u2019 experience in the field of stress and time management and personal growth. Her latest book is The Confident Introvert, written to help introverts overcome the stress of living in a culture that idealizes extroversion, so that they can thrive, and not just survive.Visit her website at <a href=\"http:\/\/www.creativelifechanges.com\/\">http:\/\/www.creativelifechanges.com\/<\/a> to see more in-depth articles and to view her programs.<\/span>\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[579,697,698,699,306,321,639,584,338,700,635,379,701,15],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Social Confidence and \u201cExtrovert Skills\u201d - Quiet Brilliance Consulting<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Social Confidence and \u201cExtrovert Skills\u201d - Quiet Brilliance Consulting\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"\u201cI used my extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cI had to learn some extrovert skills.\u201d \u201cOh, well, I don\u2019t have extrovert skills.\u201d I hear these phrases all the time \u2013 and they drive me crazy. When did the ability to be socially graceful or to display good manners become the sole province of one group of people, one [&hellip;]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Quiet Brilliance Consulting\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/lynette.crane\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2015-12-04T16:56:17+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-04-08T23:57:28+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/hand-shake.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"450\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"300\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Lynette\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@lynettecrane\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@lynettecrane\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Lynette\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Lynette\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/#\/schema\/person\/c7579458b4bf23f57c3ef33fe1a36cf8\"},\"headline\":\"Social Confidence and \u201cExtrovert Skills\u201d\",\"datePublished\":\"2015-12-04T16:56:17+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-04-08T23:57:28+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/\"},\"wordCount\":605,\"commentCount\":1,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/hand-shake.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"Coach for introverts\",\"create long-lasting bonds\",\"Extrovert Skills\",\"Good social behavior\",\"introvert\",\"introverts\",\"introverts and communication\",\"Introverts and stress\",\"public speaking\",\"Social Confidence\",\"social interaction\",\"social skills\",\"stay motivated\",\"stress\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/quietbrillianceconsulting.com\/social-confidence-and-extrovert-skills\/\",\"name\":\"Social Confidence and \u201cExtrovert Skills\u201d - 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