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Hello, Extrovert Leaders! How are you? I\u2019d love to meet you in person, but I seldom have the chance.<\/span><\/p>\n You see, I give talks on how organizations are overlooking and under-utilizing the people who are generally called introverts, whom I call \u201cquietly brilliant.\u201d (The term introvert is fine, even though in our society the label is too often confused with shy or neurotic.)<\/span><\/p>\n When I give my talks, the room is generally crowded \u2013 sometimes with standing room only \u2013 with introverts. I\u2019m grateful for the enthusiasm but sad that I am repeatedly preaching to the choir. Introverts are grateful to have their positive attributes discussed openly, along with ways leaders can help them engage. But they often say the same thing, \u201cThe person who needs to be here isn\u2019t. I wish my extrovert supervisor could hear this.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n So I\u2019m asking you: why do you not come? Is it that you think you don\u2019t need to know how to engage with us because there aren\u2019t that many of us in the workplace? Perhaps you don\u2019t realize introverts are over 50% of the population; this would include your employees, staff, and team members.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n By the way, that includes your customers and clients, too. Wouldn\u2019t you like to:\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Turn those cool and seemingly unapproachable colleagues and teammates into warm and dedicated contributors?<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Run meetings where EVERYONE contributes without pulling teeth?<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Discover new sources of innovative leadership in your organization that you didn\u2019t suspect existed?<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Develop warm collaboration within your department and with other departments?<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Work with resistant, deep-thinking prospects to earn their respect \u2013 and eventually their business?<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Use rewards that really fit individual temperament \u2013 and truly motivate people?<\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n And this knowledge and these skills aren\u2019t limited to your professional life.<\/span><\/p>\n Maybe you have one of the following challenges:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 A child who doesn\u2019t seem motivated in the same ways you are, and you are exhausted\u00a0trying to reach them.<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 Your mate sometimes retreats into a private world where you can\u2019t seem to follow.<\/span><\/p>\n All of these and more are reasons to understand the neurological differences between introverts and extroverts, and to be willing to work with those differences to facilitate communication.<\/span><\/p>\n Here are a few starting points:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n We prefer quality over quantity:<\/strong> \u201cInnie\u2019s\u201d brains respond more strongly to external stimulation of all kinds \u2013 conversation, noise, clutter \u2013 than do \u201couties.\u201d So we get overwhelmed and exhausted more easily. As a consequence, we need to retreat to recover from too many conversations and ideas. \u00a0We want meaningful conversations, not \u201csmall talk.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n We process things deeply:<\/strong> Information that enters the introvert\u2019s brain is processed through more areas of the brain than for the extrovert before the introvert responds. In addition, quiet people are often storehouses \u2013 no, warehouses \u2013 of detailed information that they can pull together to give a really insightful picture of a situation.<\/span><\/p>\n So how do handle these differences? Here are some of the things you can do to connect and communicate:<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 \u00a0Send advance signals when you want to engage an introvert<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n A good place to start, if you run meetings, is to have an agenda that you give out in advance (not just on the table as the meeting starts). Or you can casually give verbal advance notice, as in, \u201cWe\u2019re meeting later today and I\u2019d like your thoughts on \u2026.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u2022 \u00a0 \u00a0Slow down and allow pauses in conversation\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n You may expect conversation to flow quickly and easily. When there is a pause, you may be tempted to fill the silence with prompting, such as, \u201cSo what do you think?\u201d or \u201cShould we go ahead with this?<\/span><\/p>\n Curb that impulse. After you\u2019ve fired your request, if you\u2019re pretty sure you\u2019re talking to one of these quiet people, take a deep breath, relax your body language, and wait for what you will feel is an interminable amount of time but is actually just as few seconds. The result can be a thoughtful, in-depth response, and can be well worth waiting for.<\/span><\/p>\n You can also fire off your request, leave the scene, and come back later, asking, \u201cDo you have any further thoughts on what I said earlier?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n More reasons to motivate you to understand introversion<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n Introverts may constitute more than 50% of the intellectually gifted. In fact, one study indicates we may be 75% of the gifted. With people such as Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, and Warren Buffett on our team, it\u2019s no surprise to some of us.<\/span><\/p>\n As a lifelong introvert, I realize introverts also need to develop skills to understand the extrovert temperament, reach out, and communicate better. It\u2019s a two-way street on which I am dedicated to making the traffic flow better.<\/span><\/p>\n But I need both sides to participate to make this truly happen. Please join in the discussion if and when you have a chance. Learning how to connect and communicate with people who are different from you is a life-enriching experience, both professionally and personally.<\/span><\/p>\n Finally, when faced with what seems to be a non-participating employee, consider this question asked by a veteran consultant: \u201cDid you hire them that way, or did you make them that way?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n _______________________________________________________________________<\/span><\/p>\n
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